If you have kids in the 10 to 12-year age group, chances are you’re noticing a lot of changes in how they think, communicate, and behave. In this stage, kids shift from childhood to adolescence, and it can be the start of a bumpy ride in many areas for them and you. Many things in their lives become more complex at these ages – including their relationship with technology. No longer limited to simple games or cartoons, preteens are engaging in more sophisticated online interactions through things like multiplayer gaming, messaging apps, social media platforms (even when unofficially), video creation, or school-related research. 

As kids grow and change, so must the boundaries and conversations we have for them around technology, so they can stay safe while still benefiting from digital media. In this article, we’ll explore the unique developmental needs of preteens, the importance of setting screen time boundaries, and practical strategies for parents to help guide their children toward healthier screen habits.

Why screen time boundaries are important for 10 to 12-year-olds

Executive function and self-regulation are still developing

Children at this stage of development often have difficulty with impulse control, time management, and assessing risks – skills governed by the prefrontal cortex of the brain (which continues developing well into their twenties). This means they are more susceptible to losing track of time, multitasking between apps, or engaging in risky behaviors online without fully considering the consequences.

Research shows that excessive screen time during these years can interfere with the development of executive functioning skills necessary for success in school, relationships, and life. This alone is reason for you to be aware of your child’s digital media use and set appropriate boundaries.

Mental health and social pressures are increasing

Preteens are beginning to form more complex social identities, and digital platforms can increase their insecurities. They may compare themselves to others, seek external validation, or become exposed to cyberbullying. Studies have linked high screen use (especially on social media) with increased rates of depression and anxiety among children in this age group. By setting and enforcing limits during this stage of development, you can help your kids stay mentally healthy and avoid more serious issues as they move into the teen years.

Academic demands are rising

As children approach middle school, they face more demanding academic expectations. Unregulated screen time can get in the way of more important activities like reading, physical activity, extra-curricular activities, and sleep – all of which are necessary for healthy development and school success.

With these developmental factors in mind, you can see that setting thoughtful and supportive boundaries around screen time is not about punishment. It’s about helping preteens develop balance, responsibility, and long-term digital wellbeing.

Strategies for setting screen time boundaries for preteens

1. Co-create a screen time agreement

At this age, it’s important to include your child in setting screen time expectations. Sit down together to create a family digital agreement that includes agreed-upon limits, such as:

• No screens during meals or before bed
• Maximum non-school screen time per day (e.g. 2 hours)
• Tech-free times for family connection, friends, or outdoor play
• Guidelines for social media, gaming, or video content.

Collaboratively creating the agreement gives your child a sense of ownership and encourages more consistent follow-through.

2. Balance screen time with “screen-free” anchors

Work with your child to create daily routines that prioritize essential activities before screen time is allowed. For example:

• 30 minutes of physical activity or time outside
• Homework must be completed
• Chores or family responsibilities
• Reading or creative projects.

This strategy promotes balance and helps your kids learn what to prioritize before time on screens.

3. Encourage mindful screen use, not just less screen use

Instead of focusing solely on how much time your child is spending on screens, pay attention to what they’re doing and how it makes them feel. Watching a science documentary, coding a game, or FaceTiming a grandparent has different effects than scrolling TikTok or binge-watching shows.

Help your child learn to reflect on their media habits by asking:

• “How do you feel after spending time on that app?”
• “What did you learn from that video?”
• “Do you think that game makes you feel calm or frustrated?”

These conversations support media literacy and emotional awareness. This is also a good time to mention that kids at this stage of development should not have their own social media accounts, or be spending a significant amount of time on social media platforms. Most social media platforms require users to be at least 13 years old – but it’s up to you to decide whether your child is ready to use social media in a healthy way when the time comes.

4. Use parental control tools to support limits

Parenting is tough, so I always encourage the use of technology to make things easier on yourself when you can. Using parental control tools like Qustodio (the app I used when my kids were under 18) helps you stay consistent with implementing and enforcing the rules and boundaries you set for your kids. These apps are used in addition to device-specific options, and offer customizable features that allow you to:

• Set daily time limits
• Block inappropriate content
• Monitor app usage, website visits, and messaging
• Get alerts when concerning topics come up in messages 
• Schedule device-free periods (e.g., bedtime)

For more on this, check out this guide to using parental controls for tweens and teens.

5. Be consistent but flexible

Kids at this age do well with consistency, but it’s also important to remain flexible. Some days they may need more screen time for schoolwork or have a virtual hangout with friends. Be willing to adjust as needed, but don’t abandon the boundaries altogether. Regular check-ins about how the screen time rules are working can help keep the plan updated and appropriate.

Communication tips for talking to tweens about screen time

Frame the purpose of boundaries

“I know how much you enjoy your games and videos, and I think it’s awesome that you’ve found things you like. But I’ve noticed that too much screen time can make it harder for you to focus, sleep, and feel your best. I want to help you stay healthy and balanced, so let’s work on a plan that helps you do both.”

This communicates support and sets the stage for cooperation.

Discuss online safety and behavior

Talk openly about safe and respectful online behavior, even if your child isn’t officially on social media yet:

“If someone says something that makes you uncomfortable, or if you see something weird or upsetting, I want you to come talk to me. You won’t be in trouble. I’ll help you figure it out.”

Normalize coming to you for help and keep lines of communication open.

Encourage self-awareness

Ask questions that help your child reflect:

“Have you noticed how you feel when you spend a lot of time on your tablet?” 

“Do you think that show or game helps you feel more relaxed, or stressed?”

These discussions build self-regulation and internal motivation to make better choices.

Supporting kids through these preteen years can feel tough. Setting screen time boundaries for them isn’t about rigid control, it’s about continuing to foster responsibility, balance, and long-term digital wellness. As your child begins to develop more opinions and independence, this is an ideal time to teach skills that will serve them in adolescence and beyond. Through consistent routines, collaborative planning, and open communication, you can help your preteen use technology in ways that support their development, relationships, and well-being.

There are many reasons why someone might want the privacy and untraceability of a second, secret phone – often called a burner phone. While there are legitimate and practical uses, the term usually brings to mind unfaithful partners, drug dealers, and other shady characters.

But what about your own child?

Faced with their parents’ monitoring and screen time restrictions, a teenager might resort to buying secret, second phones to covertly continue their online social lives. The obvious risks of a child secretly using an unrestricted, untraceable device make burner phones yet another digital concern for parents to be vigilant about.

What is a burner phone?

A burner phone, sometimes called a “burner,” is typically a prepaid phone that can be purchased cheaply at mass retailers like Walmart or Target. They are typically purchased with cash, come with prepaid minutes (pay-as-you-go), and don’t require a contract with a service provider or need any form of legal identification verification at the point of sale. The term “burner phone” comes from the fact that these phones are often discarded, or “burnt” after they’ve served their purpose.

Thanks to references in pop culture, burner phones have earned a reputation for their role in criminal activities, such as in the TV series Breaking Bad, as well as being a symbol of secrecy in extramarital affairs, as seen in Desperate Housewives. Burner phones are often used for shady activities, but they have legitimate purposes too. For example, journalists and undercover law enforcement agents might use burner phones to protect their identity and avoid being tracked, while travelers to high-crime areas might use one during their trip to avoid losing their main phone.   

Burner phones don’t have to be cheap, basic phones either; you can easily get prepaid Android phones, iPhones, and other smartphones.

What are trap phones?

A term mostly used in U.S. rap and street culture, a trap phone is a type of burner phone, more commonly associated with drug dealing. The term “trap” comes from “trap house,” a residence used for selling drugs.

Other names for a burner phone include a prepaid phone, disposable phone, throwaway phone, ghost phone, and side phone.

Are burner phones legal?

Burner phones are legal in most countries; they are just prepaid, disposable phones that can be purchased without a contract or identification verification. As long as they’re not used for criminal activities, there’s no legal issue with owning or using a burner phone.

Some countries, however, have strict regulations that make it hard to buy or use a burner phone. For example, in India, Russia, and China, SIM cards must be registered with governmental authorities.

Why might my child be using a burner phone?

If your child is hiding a second phone from you, chances are they’re not using it for legitimate reasons. Here are a few motives they might have for owning and using a burner phone – some more concerning than others. 

As a backup if their main phone is taken away

It’s common for parents to threaten to confiscate their children’s phones as punishment or to enforce screen time limits. In response, kids might prepare themselves by keeping a burner phone.

To get around parental controls

If you’ve installed parental control tools like Qustodio on your child’s device, they might use a burner phone to continue their online activities without the monitoring and safeguards you’ve put in place – such as screen time limits or app blocking.

To keep their social lives secret

While at times it can be frustrating for parents, it’s normal for teenagers to seek privacy and be tight-lipped about their social lives. Some might even use a secret phone to keep in touch with friends and love interests – away from the watchful eyes of parents or monitoring tools.   

To cyberbully or engage in risky online behavior 

Although we don’t like to imagine our kids causing harm to others, it can happen, and a burner phone allows them to bully or spread hate with less risk of being caught. If you think your child might be harassing others online, take a look at this insightful article by child psychologist Dr. Beurkens: My child is a cyberbully: What should I do?

A burner phone could also be used to hide inappropriate, and potentially dangerous,  relationships from parents and, in extreme cases, to engage in illegal activities like buying drugs. 

How to find out if someone has a burner phone

Since a burner phone is meant to be kept secret, it’s unlikely that your child will tell you they’re using one, especially if it’s to bypass parental controls or for more concerning reasons. Aside from catching them using an unfamiliar phone red-handed, there are other ways you can confirm your suspicions. 

Although their burner phone won’t have parental controls, you can use the Qustodio Parents app to monitor changes in usage on their primary phone. Drastic shifts in screen time habits could indicate they’re using a second device. For example, if they typically spend a couple of hours on Snapchat each day and that suddenly drops to zero, that could be an indication they’re using the app on another phone. Of course, there are other reasons why they might be using an app less – such as simply losing interest – so it’s important to talk to them before jumping to conclusions. 

You can also check your home’s Wi-Fi network for unknown devices. Most modern routers allow you to view a list of connected devices by logging into the router’s web interface. However, this method is only useful if they’re using Wi-Fi at home – it won’t detect a device using prepaid data 

I found out my teen has a burner phone. What should I do?

Discovering that your child has been hiding a secret phone might be disappointing, but it’s important to approach the situation calmly and without accusations. 

1. Start an open conversation

Let them know you’re not upset, but you’re concerned and want to understand why they feel the need to hide a second phone from you.

2. Emphasize trust and safety rather than punishment

It may be tempting to reprimand your child for using a secret phone, but doing so could shut down communication between you. Instead, let your child know that your main concern is their wellbeing, and encourage them to share their thoughts and feelings openly, reassuring them that they won’t be punished for being honest.

Remind them that you monitor their device, not to be a spy, but to help them stay safe online. An unmonitored phone could expose them to harmful content and dangerous people, such as online predators and cyberbullies.

3. Reconsider screen time boundaries

Finding out your teen has a secret phone might prompt you to reassess device rules. If they’ve resorted to using a burner phone for more privacy or because they feel their screen time is too limited, it could open up a conversation about the rules and restrictions currently in place. You might consider revising screen time limits or adjusting message alerts to help keep your child safe while respecting their needs and privacy.

Some teenagers turn to burner phones to bypass parental controls, maintain private relationships, or engage in risky online behavior with less chance of being caught. If you suspect your child has a second phone, it’s best to approach the situation with empathy and understanding rather than punishment. By encouraging open conversations and helping them recognize the risks of using an unmonitored device, you can better support their digital wellbeing in the long run. 

The rise of online gambling sites and apps has made gambling more accessible than ever. In seconds, we can load an app and stake money on poker, roulette, or blackjack – or bet on football games, horse races, presidential elections, and even the Oscars.

As convenient as it is, the ability to wager on almost anything at your fingertips can be disastrous for the estimated 5 million Americans who meet the criteria for compulsive gamblers. 

And what about kids?

In the past, a child would have had to illegally enter an 18+ casino or betting shop to gamble. Today, it’s relatively easy for a minor to access an online gambling platform and start taking their chances – often without fully understanding the risks involved.

The rise in teens gambling online

In our 2024 report, only 39% of parents admitted feeling concerned about their children accessing gambling content online. Yet, youth gambling has recently been described as a “massive public health problem,” with children as young as 10 showing signs of addiction.

Depending on the country or state, the law requires people to be over 18 or 21 to gamble online. Although most online gambling platforms state that they have age restrictions, they often aren’t enforced strongly, if at all. For example, a minor could bypass an age verification process by using information from an older sibling or parent.   

You don’t have to spend long online to see how young people are being drawn into the flashy yet hollow world of gambling through a range of questionable tactics, including:

• Targeted social media ads – Platforms like TikTok and Instagram are guilty of bombarding underage users with gambling ads, often with cartoonish graphics and trendy slang to make betting seem fun and harmless.
• Influencer and streamer promotions – Content creators on Twitch, YouTube, and TikTok normalize gambling by promoting platforms or even streaming their bets, turning high-risk wagers into entertainment.
• Free-to-play gambling apps – Games featuring poker, slots, and blackjack may seem harmless at first, but they frequently push players to purchase in-app currency, blurring the lines between gaming and real gambling.
• Sports betting – Major events like the Super Bowl are flooded with ads for betting platforms, conditioning young fans to associate sports with gambling.
• “Risk-free” betting offers – Promos like “free bets” and “bonus cash” make gambling seem like an easy, no-strings-attached activity.

Loot boxes and gacha games: Gambling gateways?

Gambling platforms and their murky marketing strategies aside, there’s a more insidious way that young people are being unknowingly conditioned to gamble –  through video games.

Loot boxes are virtual items in video games that players can purchase or earn through gameplay, offering randomized rewards like character skins, weapons, or other in-game bonuses. The excitement of not knowing what you’ll get until you open the box, and the prospect of scoring a rare and valuable item, has led to criticism that video games are increasingly resembling gambling platforms. Loot box mechanics can be found in many “free-to-play” mobile games including Clash Royale, Brawl Stars, and Call of Duty: Mobile. 

Gacha games are video games that encourage players to win virtual items like cards and characters through a mechanism, similar to a vending machine, in which players pull, spin, or roll using in-game currency. Like with loot boxes, gacha games are considered akin to gambling and have been criticized for encouraging children to spend large amounts of money in the hopes of winning big. 

At the time of writing, Japan, China, South Korea, Belgium, and the Netherlands have either banned or introduced strict regulations on loot boxes and gacha games due to concerns that they resemble gambling.  

The dangers of gambling online for teens

It might start innocently, but gambling online with digital money or game skins comes with real-life risks that younger people might not fully understand. Irresponsible gambling can have devastating effects on people of all ages but their still-developing brains mean the dangers can be much worse for children.

Addiction and problem gambling

Research has shown that 2% to 7% of young people may develop a gambling disorder as opposed to around 1% of adults. Some attribute this to young brains being more sensitive to dopamine, the “feel-good” neurotransmitter released during gambling wins. This heightened response can make gambling feel even more addictive for teens.

Serious financial loss

One of the biggest pitfalls of gambling is not knowing when to walk away. Since developing brains struggle to assess risk versus reward accurately, teenagers are more likely to fall into dangerous gambling patterns and accumulate significant debt – whether through many small bets or one giant, regrettable wager. In a desperate attempt to keep gambling, a child might even use their parent’s payment card, leading to a nasty surprise when the monthly statement arrives.

Negative impact on mental health

Gambling, especially when started at a young age, can have serious, long-term mental health consequences, including anxiety, stress, depression, and impulse control issues. Teens who gamble are also more likely to engage in other risky behaviors, such as alcohol and substance use; and studies have shown that gambling addicts have the highest suicide rate of any addiction disorder.

Legal issues

If caught gambling underage, some countries and states hold minors accountable, imposing fines or, in extreme cases, even criminal charges – especially if identity fraud is involved, such as using a fake ID to bypass age verification.

How to protect your teen from the dangers of gambling

Sitting alongside other concerning online content like pornography, violence, and illegal substance use, gambling is often overlooked by parents – yet its dangers shouldn’t be. With problem gambling on the rise among young people, we recommend that parents take a more proactive approach to this growing online threat.

1. Learn the warning signs

If your teen is gambling online, they’re likely doing it in secret. However, the following signs might indicate that your child is gambling, and spotting them early can help you step in before it develops into a bigger problem. Note that these aren’t exclusive to online gambling and may point to something else troubling your teen.

• Frequently asking for money or your credit card information
• Increased time spent online
• Behavioral changes such as mood swings, aggression, and depression
• Increased interest in gaming and competition
• Less engagement in school and other activities

2. Model healthy behavior

Research has shown that problem gambling can be passed down through generations, so leading by example should always be a priority. If you enjoy gambling occasionally, avoid doing it in front of your children, encouraging them to join in, placing bets for them, or boasting about your wins. 

3. Set spending rules for games with gambling mechanics

The controversial presence of loot boxes and other gambling-like features in video games can condition kids to gamble without them even realizing it. For many games, you can set spending limits to control how much your child can spend on loot boxes, usually a maximum monthly budget. 

Avoid saving credit or debit card details in the game. To limit how much your child spends on loot boxes and other in-app purchases, consider using gift cards or prepaid cards instead.  

If you want to block the ability to make in-game purchases completely, you can usually do this via the device’s parental controls. For example, for Call of Duty: Mobile on iOS, you can disable in-app purchases by turning on Content & Privacy Restrictions; on Android, this can be done in Play Store settings.

4. Use external parental controls 

For peace of mind, parental control tools like Qustodio can help further protect your child from gambling by allowing you to:

• Block gambling or gaming apps from being opened
• Receive alerts when your child searches for something gambling-related
• Set time limits for gaming apps like Clash Royale, Brawl Stars, and Call of Duty: Mobile.
• “Pull the plug” and immediately pause the internet to stop whatever your child is doing online.

While parents’ focus is often on keeping their kids away from other dark corners of the internet, teens gambling online is a growing concern that shouldn’t be ignored. Despite it being illegal in most places for minors, gambling is hyped up by influencers and streamers, and targeted ads on their favorite platforms mean kids can be lured by “free bets” and other irresistible promotions. Perhaps most concerning, is the concept of loot boxes in video games and gacha games, both of which can condition kids to gamble. 

A child’s still-developing brain means that the possibility of addiction and other dangers of gambling are heightened for minors. To reduce these risks, parents need to take a proactive approach which might include watching out for warning signs, modeling healthy behavior, and using parental controls.  

What did you want to be when you grew up?

Maybe it was a doctor, a veterinarian, or an astronaut. While most of us have settled into careers far removed from what we dreamt of as children, today’s digitally native kids have slightly different aspirations. In a 2024 study, UK children aged 6 to 17 were asked which future profession they would most like to have. Along with “pro gamer” and “soccer player”, “streamer” came out on top.

Live streaming on Twitch, Kick, and other platforms can offer teenagers the opportunity to express themselves, improve social skills, and build a community – and for a very limited few, the chance to get rich and famous. However, broadcasting live on the internet has a unique set of safety risks that parents of wannabe streaming stars need to be aware of.

What is live streaming?

Live streaming, or simply “streaming”, refers to broadcasting live to the world on the internet. Streaming is different from traditional video content, in that it unfolds in real-time, it’s unedited, and it allows viewers to interact with you in the moment. You can live stream on YouTube and all of the main social media platforms, TikTok, Instagram, Facebook, and X; but Twitch and Kick are dedicated streaming platforms, and the most popular options for anyone serious about their streaming.

What do people live stream?

You can live stream while doing pretty much anything; cooking, performing music, painting, working out, or even just talking about your day. However, gaming is by far the most popular streaming category and what most refer to when talking about streaming. Gamers often stream on Twitch, showcasing esports tournaments, playthroughs, speedruns, and game reviews, all while engaging with their audience in real time. The games Fortnite, Minecraft, and League of Legends are among those that dominate the most-watched charts on Twitch.

Why might your child want to become a streamer? 

Your child’s motivation to become a streamer can come from a variety of places. Twitch is one of the most popular entertainment platforms for kids, especially gamers, so it’s no wonder that they may want to emulate the successful streamers they watch daily.

Money is also a big motivator for teenagers looking to become financially independent from their parents – but making big bucks requires a lot of followers. As an estimate, streamers with between 50 and 200 consistent viewers could earn between $50 to $1500 per month. At the other end of the spectrum, a top-tier streamer with 40,000 subscribers could earn $100,000 per month. 

Not all young streamers dream of amassing followers or a fortune. Streaming to an audience, no matter how large can help a child build their confidence and social skills, as well as exercising their creativity. What’s more, some teens use platforms like Twitch simply to connect with friends and family, playing games together and chatting in real time. 

How old do you need to be to stream on Twitch, Kick, and other platforms?

Twitch’s Guide for Parents and Educators states that children above the age of 13 can stream on the platform. It also expresses that users under 18 can only use Twitch under the supervision of a parent or legal guardian – although Twitch doesn’t have a strict verification system to prove that a parent is supervising a minor’s account. Any under 13s found to be streaming on the platform will have their account suspended indefinitely.

Kick’s ToS also states that users must be over 13 (or the age of digital consent in their country) and under 18s must seek the supervision of a parent or guardian before streaming. It’s also 13+ for live streaming on Facebook, Instagram, X, and YouTube. The latter allows streaming for under 13s only when they are visibly accompanied by an adult. To go LIVE on TikTok, a user must be over 18, and confirmed with a government-issued ID.

The safety risks for teen streamers

While it isn’t “new”, faster internet, better technology, and social media integration have helped skyrocket live streaming’s popularity in recent years – and so, many of us might not yet be aware of its unique risks to children. 

Cyberbullying

The ability to interact with a streamer in real time is one of the most appealing features of live streaming, and while chat is usually positive, it can be used by those intending to cause harm. 

Live grooming

The popularity of streaming among minors has led to the emergence of a specific form of grooming known as “live grooming.” Predators target young streamers on platforms like Twitch, TikTok, YouTube Live, and others, using live chat to build trust and manipulate minors into potentially dangerous situations.

In-stream chat aside, private messaging, or DMs, is a common way a predator could get close to a minor. On Twitch, private messages, or “whispers”, are automatically disabled for under 18s (but can be manually re-enabled). Other platforms like TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook have restrictions on private messaging for minors, but none of these measures are completely foolproof.

Impact on self-esteem

Whether hosting a YouTube channel or streaming on Twitch, putting yourself out there in any form is not for the thin-skinned. The chat feed on a live stream can contain harsh, negative, and even hateful criticisms of the stream or the streamer personally. Your child’s self-esteem might also take a hit if they fail to amass followers or hit the heady heights they dreamed of before starting their streaming journey.

The reality is that only a small fraction of streamers achieve fame and fortune. If your child has unrealistic expectations, they may be left feeling disappointed if those dreams don’t come true any time soon. 

Revealing private information

When we’re relaxed and having fun, it’s easy to overshare without realizing the potential consequences. For children, who may not fully understand the risks of revealing personal information, the dangers are even greater. Sharing details like their real name, location, school, or phone number on a live stream can expose them to serious threats, including doxxing, harassment, scams, and grooming.

Saying or doing something they later regret

Similar to screenshotting a disappearing message on Snapchat, a live streamer could say or do something regrettable in the heat of the moment and, thanks to screen recorders and similar software, it can be immortalized forever. While Twitch does not “allow” viewers to record or download someone else’s stream without permission, the platform can not detect people using screen recording software. 

Gaming addiction

On Twitch, streamers are often praised and rewarded for dedicating long hours to gaming. The fear of disappointing their audience or losing followers can push young streamers to play excessively, increasing the risk of, or even justifying, a gaming addiction.

Dares, challenges, and requests 

In a bid to please and keep their hard-won army of followers, a streamer may resort to accepting dares, challenges and requests. These can range from the seemingly harmless, like doing a TikTok dance or playing a game with one hand, to activities violent or sexual in nature. 

4 tips to help your teen stream safely

The risks are real and numerous, but if after talking it through with your child, you’re happy with allowing them to live stream, you need to get to know the platforms and tools that will help to keep your child safe . For example, Twitch provides safeguard tools like chat filters and stream moderation, plus a dedicated safety team working at all times to prevent harm before it happens.

To help make your teen’s streaming venture a happy and safe one, we suggest combining the platform’s safety features with the following tips.

1. Get involved with their streaming

Consider watching or even participating in your teen’s streams. This allows you to monitor what they say and do on camera while also getting a sense of their interactions with followers. Showing interest in their streaming activities can help build trust, making them more likely to turn to you if something concerning happens online.

2. Have a safety plan

Whichever platform your teen uses to stream, ensure they have the appropriate privacy settings enabled and they know how to report or block troubling users. On Twitch, for example, make sure your teen knows how to block whispers from strangers and ban problematic viewers; and knows how to activate “Shield mode” to protect against sudden chat abuse.

3. Reiterate the importance of privacy 

What’s said or seen in a live stream cannot be edited out. Therefore, it’s doubly important that your teen takes precautions not to give away any personal details to strangers watching their stream. This list isn’t exhaustive, but here are a few ways your child can protect their privacy while streaming:

• Do not reveal real names, addresses, workplaces or schools
• Do not wear school or work uniforms
• Be mindful of what’s visible that could reveal identity or location , i.e. landmarks or street signs from a window, shipping labels on packages
• Consider using a VPN to mask location
• Remind friends not to accidentally dox during a stream by mentioning real names, hometowns, schools, or workplaces.

4. Get a helping hand from parental control tools

Although streaming and social media platforms offer features to protect minors, an external parental control tool like Qustodio can provide an extra layer of security for your teen streamer. With Qustodio, you can track their time on streaming platforms, set limits if needed, or even block access entirely. Plus, you have the power to instantly cut off a stream by pausing the internet.

Live streaming on platforms like Twitch is extremely popular among teens, and many dream of making it big just like their online heroes. Although the chances of them becoming rich and famous are slim, some consider streaming a rewarding pastime that allows teenagers to express themselves while connecting with a community. Streaming does, however, have a unique set of dangers that you and your teen need to be aware of. By optimizing the platform’s safety settings and following the safety tips above, you can help your teen “go live” to the world safely.

Parenting is a process of making the best decisions we can with what we know at the time, and then revising those decisions when we see negative results or get new information. Very little is black and white in the realm of raising children, and screen time is no exception. While allowing children access to screens can provide educational value, social connection, and entertainment, it can also easily spiral into excessive use that affects our children’s health and well-being

When screen time gets too much

If you notice that your child’s screen time has gotten out of hand, you may feel the need to tighten the reins. However, revising screen time rules (especially if you’ve been more lenient) can lead to resistance, emotional reactions, and pushback. If you’re feeling like giving up and just allowing the status quo to continue, I want to encourage you to forge ahead with making changes to the screen time rules and boundaries in your home. The key is understanding how to implement these changes effectively while supporting your child through the process. It’s never too late to set new expectations to support your child’s wellbeing when it comes to devices.

In this article, we’ll explore strategies for you to walk back more lenient screen time rules, address frustrations and complaints at different developmental stages, and help your kids process their emotions. By doing so, you’ll create healthier boundaries around screen time without creating unnecessary conflict.

Step 1: Acknowledge their emotions

Before you implement any changes, it’s essential to prepare yourself for emotional reactions from your child. The idea of suddenly losing access to devices or seeing their screen time reduced can bring up feelings of frustration, confusion, resentment, and even anger. These emotional responses are normal, and as parents, we need to be empathetic and supportive as we make changes to the rules. When you’re mentally and emotionally prepared for your child’s resistance, it helps you stay steady and follow through. 

When your child expresses resistance, acknowledge their feelings first. For example, if your child says, “This isn’t fair! You can’t just change the rules!” you could respond with something like, “I understand that this feels unfair, and it’s frustrating when things change. I know you enjoy your screen time, but I also care about your health and wellbeing, and that’s why we need to make some adjustments.” Tell them what you’re seeing in them, or new information you’ve learned, that’s leading to the changes. They need to know the “why”, even though they probably won’t agree.

The goal is to allow space for your child to feel heard while also reinforcing the reason behind the rule changes. By doing this, you reduce the likelihood of their emotional reactions spiraling into more conflict.

Step 2: Implement age-appropriate adjustments and address objections

Once you’ve broached the topic and allowed your child to express their emotions, you want to consider how to revise screen time rules at different ages. While the basic approach remains the same – be clear about your goals and give them a sense of autonomy – different age kids will present unique objections and responses to the new boundaries.

Toddlers and young children (ages 2-5)

At this age, children’s screen time should be limited, but they may not yet fully understand the concept of restrictions. If screen time has been a regular part of their routine, you may find that they object when it’s suddenly reduced. A common objection might sound like, “I don’t want to stop watching!” or “I want the iPad!”

How to respond: Keep the explanation short and simple. “We’re going to play for a little while, and then it’s time to do something else. You can use the tablet after we finish reading a story, but after that it’s time to play outside.” Offering a choice between two activities (both of which are acceptable to you) can empower your child to feel in control. For example, “You can play outside or do a puzzle, and we’ll have another screen time session tomorrow.”

It’s important to be consistent with the rules and not give in to emotional outbursts. If your child cries or throws a tantrum, remain calm and supportive but stick to your limits. You can empathize by saying something like, “I know you’re upset. It’s hard when we have to stop something fun, but we’re going to do something else now.”

School-aged children (ages 6-12)

Once kids enter school they develop a sense of independence, and screen time may become more tied to their social world. They like connecting with friends online or watching shows and discussing them with their peers. When you start to restrict their screen time they may argue, “But all my friends are playing that game!” or “I need to watch the new episode of my favorite show tonight!”

How to respond: Validate their feelings by acknowledging the importance of friends and interests. “I get that your friends are playing that game and watching that show, and it’s hard to miss out. But you can still spend time with your friends tomorrow. Right now we’re taking a break from screens.”

Offering an alternative activity can also help make the transition easier. For instance, “I know you love gaming, so we’ll take a break now, but after dinner we can play a family board game together.” Offering engaging non-screen-based options encourages your child to see other activities as fun, not as a punishment.

You can also let your child know that the boundaries are a trial and part of a healthy routine. “I know it’s tough to limit screen time, but we’re trying it for this week to see how we feel. We’ll talk again next week to see how we’re doing.” This helps them know that you’re open to revisiting rules over time depending on how well things are going for them and the family.

Teens (ages 13+)

Teenagers are often the most resistant to changes in screen time boundaries, especially if they feel like it’s infringing on their independence. When you try to reduce their screen time a common objection might be, “You’re treating me like a little kid!” or “You don’t understand how important this is to me!”

How to respond: This is where open, honest communication is key. Instead of simply laying down the law, explain your reasoning and invite your teen to join in the conversation. “I understand that you’re older and you’re more responsible with your screen time. However, I’m concerned about how much time you’re spending on your devices. It’s affecting your sleep, your mood, and how much time you’re spending with your friends and family.”

Use these discussions to help your teen identify areas where they can self-regulate. For example, “How do you feel about using your phone only during certain times of the day? Maybe you could start by putting it away during family dinner or an hour before bed so we can all unwind.”

Another way to approach this is to give your teen some input on the rules. “I know you value your social connections, so let’s work together to set some limits. How much screen time do you think is fair, and when would you be willing to turn off your devices for other activities?”

If your teen argues that they have too much schoolwork or extracurricular commitments, remind them of the need for balance. “I know you’re busy with school and activities. That’s why we’re limiting screen time to give you more space to focus on those things, while also allowing you to relax without distractions.”

No matter your child’s age, the key here is to expect they will be unhappy with the changes. They do not have to fully understand or agree with your insight and decisions for you to move forward with changes. Check out this article for additional tips on how to communicate with your kids about ending screen time.

Step 3: Stay consistent and provide positive reinforcement

One of the biggest challenges parents face when revising screen time rules is sticking to the new boundaries. It’s easy to cave in and go back to old habits – especially when their emotions are running high. Consistency is essential, no matter how much they push back. When you make the rules clear and stick to them, your child will eventually adapt. Extreme dysregulation when limiting devices is a major sign that you need to forge ahead, as they have likely developed an unhealthy reliance on their devices and digital media.

It’s also helpful to offer positive reinforcement when your child complies with the new boundaries. For example, you could say, “I’m really proud of how you handled your screen time today. I love how you spent time with your friends outside!” Reinforcing positive behavior strengthens your child’s ability to make good choices on their own. Pointing out the positives you see in areas like being more focused on school work, falling asleep more easily at night, or just generally being more pleasant also helps them connect the dots between the changes in device rules and how they’re feeling and functioning.

Know you’re doing the right thing

Revising your child’s screen time boundaries is never easy, especially when you’re walking back rules that have been in place for a while. Children will express frustration, resistance, or even resentment. By acknowledging their emotions, maintaining open communication, and implementing age-appropriate strategies, you can guide them toward healthier screen time habits. 

Remember that this process is about creating balance, not punishment. Help yourself manage new expectations and rules by using a parental control option like Qustodio to set time limits, restrict inappropriate content, and more. With consistency in applying the rules, your child will learn to manage their screen time in a way that supports their overall wellbeing.

Humans are natural problem solvers, and when things aren’t working – including ourselves – we just love to find a way to fix them. The internet has provided our insatiable curiosity with a wealth of easily accessible information; therefore, it’s no surprise that we turn to our old friend doctor Google to research and self-diagnose health conditions. This has now become so normalized that a US survey showed that 89% of participants consulted Google before seeing a doctor

As highly social creatures, we seek belonging and acceptance, gravitating towards like-minded peers – especially during adolescence. Participating in trends helps provide solidarity, and one of the more recent is discussing and sharing mental health experiences on social media, turning platforms like TikTok and Instagram into virtual diagnostic centers. Given the vulnerability of those experiencing such issues, how did openly sharing deeply personal information with thousands of online strangers become commonplace? What are the risks, and are there any benefits?

How the social media therapy phenomenon began

The 2020 global pandemic brought about an unprecedented rise in poor mental health, and many mental health practitioners, unable to consult with patients in person, started sharing their professional expertise online. At the same time, influencers – despite having little or no mental health training themselves – began sharing their therapists’ advice with their followers, leading to the phenomenon known as ‘social media therapy’ or ‘Instagram therapy’.

The ways social media influences mental health advice

Mental health (and its complex associated issues) is unique to each individual; therefore, even advice or information given online by professionals with years of training and experience, can only ever be general and educational in nature.

Influencers, despite having a large following, often lack the authority to offer mental health advice, and even with the best of intentions, the fact remains that their main goal is to increase their profile by engaging with their followers. Additionally, their content on the topic may be influenced by sponsorships, endorsements, or personal motives, potentially causing their followers more harm than good. 

One good example of this is YouTuber Tricia Paytas, who diagnosed herself with dissociative identity disorder (DID), not only spreading misinformation but undermining those who do have the disorder themselves.

That said, providing a platform where users can speak openly about mental health within a public forum does help reduce the stigma surrounding these issues, enabling individuals to feel less alone in their psychological struggles; however, the risks often outweigh the benefits, particularly when advice given without qualification causes harm through misdiagnosis.

The risks of mental health misdiagnosis

Social media therapy blurs the line between general advice and specific professional help, signaling to online users, and often young audiences, that bringing up such topics in a public forum is not just acceptable but actually the ‘healthy’ thing to do.

Young people can sometimes become so focused on making sense of their own emotions that they will resonate with 1 or 2 aspects of a particular mental health condition being discussed on social media, then mold the rest of their ‘symptoms’ to fit that diagnosis. Others who don’t match a specific diagnosis well enough may wonder what’s wrong with them or engage in online behaviors like sadfishing – posting dramatic or emotional personal stories in a vie for attention – to get the validation they seek.

Some users may correctly identify the presence of a few psychological symptoms but fail to recognise the signs of a more serious condition, and some may decline to seek professional help altogether, thinking that the online advice from a peer or an influencer they admire is all they need. Conversely, uninformed users may accuse those with a confirmed diagnosis or genuine symptoms of making fake claims for attention, often causing further harm to those already vulnerable.

When mental health becomes a trending ‘diagnosis’

Mental health diagnoses have become such an important part of TikTok’s younger community that many teens now list them as an identifier in their bio. Talking openly about mental health on social media platforms has also inadvertently led to mental health issues, such as anxiety, depression, dissociation, and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), being seen as ‘trendy’ to have.

Posting about these serious conditions through romanticized memes is referred to as ‘beautiful suffering’ by mental health professional Aditi Verma. Content like this can downplay the seriousness of mental illness and negate the struggles experienced by diagnosed sufferers.

The positives and benefits of social media therapy

While social media therapy has its downsides, openly talking about mental health online has played a vital role in reducing the stigma and embarrassment that has prevented people from seeking help in the past, along with other benefits of the social trend, such as:

• Making information more accessible
• Raising awareness and empathy
• Normalizing acceptance across different areas, such as school, work, and home
• Helping make potentially scary topics less overwhelming
• Providing a sense of solidarity for sufferers

Additionally, the power of social media to shape behavior and opinion on a massive scale has resulted in more people becoming aware of the importance of prioritizing their own wellbeing, and it has now become an integral consideration for many areas of everyday life.

Generally speaking, advice given about mental health online should be used for interest and education, as a starting point for further research, or to support those with existing mental health diagnoses. There are multiple responsible influencers like TikToker Kalista Dwyer, who has a history of mental health issues and posts on the topic in a mindful, intentional way, careful to consult with licensed professionals to ensure she steers clear of giving clinical advice.

Many social media platforms have started to recognise their impact on mental health, introducing features to help. TikTok has created stricter content guidelines and search interventions, directing users searching for potentially harmful content to local support resources as well as developing a Wellbeing Guide for engaging with others about mental health and wellbeing online. Similarly, Pinterest’s Haven consists of curated content focusing on mental health and wellbeing. But is it enough? 

The intersection of social media and mental health is complex. While social media can be a helpful platform when used safely and responsibly to improve awareness and reduce the stigma often associated with mental illness, it should complement, not replace, professional care.